Forum ethics and offending people—apology

Dizerner

Dizerner

Active Member
Some people mistake passion for rudeness, and I can understand that it could be hard to tell the difference.

And some on this forum seem to imply that I am being offensive in different ways as I stand for the truth.

I promise you, to the best of my intentions, I do not mean to speak ungraciously and I genuinely care about people.

But none of us are perfect, and neither do I claim to be.

Although my conscience does not condemn me right now, I am genuinely sorry for any mistreatment anyone has felt from my posts.

I ask for the forgiveness of anyone who feels this way.
 
You are good brother and passionate about your beliefs. I know you are a passionate defender of PSA for instance and come on strong with me. I’m ok with you
 
dizerner said:
Some people mistake passion for rudeness, and I can understand that it could be hard to tell the difference.

And some on this forum seem to imply that I am being offensive in different ways as I stand for the truth.

I promise you, to the best of my intentions, I do not mean to speak ungraciously and I genuinely care about people.

But none of us are perfect, and neither do I claim to be.

Although my conscience does not condemn me right now, I am genuinely sorry for any mistreatment anyone has felt from my posts.

I ask for the forgiveness of anyone who feels this way.
Click to expand...
All your words I'd say to people about myself as well. I like the Prayer of St Francis (just 6 lines of it below)

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me bring love.
Where there is offence, let me bring pardon.
Where there is discord, let me bring union.
Where there is error, let me bring truth.
Where there is doubt, let me bring faith.
 
dizerner said:
Some people mistake passion for rudeness, and I can understand that it could be hard to tell the difference.

And some on this forum seem to imply that I am being offensive in different ways as I stand for the truth.

I promise you, to the best of my intentions, I do not mean to speak ungraciously and I genuinely care about people.

But none of us are perfect, and neither do I claim to be.

Although my conscience does not condemn me right now, I am genuinely sorry for any mistreatment anyone has felt from my posts.

I ask for the forgiveness of anyone who feels this way.
Click to expand...
You're okay in my book. I've told you many times how much your input helped us get this forum going.
 
dizerner said:
Some people mistake passion for rudeness, and I can understand that it could be hard to tell the difference.

And some on this forum seem to imply that I am being offensive in different ways as I stand for the truth.

I promise you, to the best of my intentions, I do not mean to speak ungraciously and I genuinely care about people.

But none of us are perfect, and neither do I claim to be.

Although my conscience does not condemn me right now, I am genuinely sorry for any mistreatment anyone has felt from my posts.

I ask for the forgiveness of anyone who feels this way.
Click to expand...

It is difficult to tell someone that they are wrong. Everyone desires to be right. What we believe is the very essence of who we are. Culturally, there is a drive in our society to try and make everyone "look the same". In fact, a large portion of that "community" are Christians.

Unity does not preclude diversity. Which is something that Trinitarians can actually understand... :) (Just had to say that)

We can disagree and still realize that we all share a bond in Adam. We are brethren of the same "blood". I remind Muslims that Ishmael and Isaac had a good relationship with one another. They were brothers. However, this doesn't stop me from saying my "piece"..... :)

I've faced theological opposition most of my adult life. Most of it from simply saying "I disagree". Such is the way of this carnal life. I often want to tell those who like to complain what Paul told those at Corinth....

1Co 16:13 Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.

But that would be rude..... right?.... :)
 
praise_yeshua said:
It is difficult to tell someone that they are wrong. Everyone desires to be right. What we believe is the very essence of who we are. Culturally, there is a drive in our society to try and make everyone "look the same". In fact, a large portion of that "community" are Christians.

Unity does not preclude diversity. Which is something that Trinitarians can actually understand... :) (Just had to say that)

We can disagree and still realize that we all share a bond in Adam. We are brethren of the same "blood". I remind Muslims that Ishmael and Isaac had a good relationship with one another. They were brothers. However, this doesn't stop me from saying my "piece"..... :)

I've faced theological opposition most of my adult life. Most of it from simply saying "I disagree". Such is the way of this carnal life. I often want to tell those who like to complain what Paul told those at Corinth....

1Co 16:13 Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.

But that would be rude..... right?.... :)
Click to expand...
I for one have always enjoyed reading your posts and I'm glad you're here.
 
praise_yeshua said:
It is difficult to tell someone that they are wrong. Everyone desires to be right. What we believe is the very essence of who we are. Culturally, there is a drive in our society to try and make everyone "look the same". In fact, a large portion of that "community" are Christians.

Unity does not preclude diversity. Which is something that Trinitarians can actually understand... :) (Just had to say that)

We can disagree and still realize that we all share a bond in Adam. We are brethren of the same "blood". I remind Muslims that Ishmael and Isaac had a good relationship with one another. They were brothers. However, this doesn't stop me from saying my "piece"..... :)

I've faced theological opposition most of my adult life. Most of it from simply saying "I disagree". Such is the way of this carnal life. I often want to tell those who like to complain what Paul told those at Corinth....

1Co 16:13 Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.

But that would be rude..... right?.... :)
Click to expand...
Did I ever tell you about that time I was wrong? Okay okay it was two times. All right it was really 22 times. Man I think that goes back to Cheech and Chong
 
Handaan said:
Did I ever tell you about that time I was wrong? Okay okay it was two times. All right it was really 22 times. Man I think that goes back to Cheech and Chong
Click to expand...
Who is cheech and chong ?

something like pricilla and aquilla ?

preachers from asia ?

🤣
 
civic said:
I’ll be there and I’m hilarious 😂
Click to expand...
Well the Bible does say that laughter is good medicine. I wonder if humor and laughter are an attribute of God. He gave us our sense of humor and we're created in his image. If so he's probably laughing at us all the time huh? Like when they built the Tower of Babel. Or Jonah trying to go his own way before he gets swallowed by a whale. Yeah we need a new section on the Forum called Bible humor. We could ask the admin to put it down by the 19th hole.
 
dizerner said:
Some people mistake passion for rudeness, and I can understand that it could be hard to tell the difference.

And some on this forum seem to imply that I am being offensive in different ways as I stand for the truth.

I promise you, to the best of my intentions, I do not mean to speak ungraciously and I genuinely care about people.

But none of us are perfect, and neither do I claim to be.

Although my conscience does not condemn me right now, I am genuinely sorry for any mistreatment anyone has felt from my posts.

I ask for the forgiveness of anyone who feels this way.
Click to expand...
I think in a written medium, the most difficult thing is to get across an important point without offending.

20 years ago I was working in an office (my first. I'd been in a field construction environment dating back to 1985), and I was being told that I wasn't fitting in, and needed better communication skills.
So I was able to take a professional course on communication.

Turns out that there's a rather interesting collection of articles on this topic, and while the breakdown is done in a manner that varies, the version I learned breaks communication down in this way.



Written word- 7% of the total message.
Speech- tonality, inflection, pitch, etc... 38% of the total message.
Body language - 55% of the total message.

On internet forums, we are restricted to the written word.

This means that no matter how eloquently we are, how descriptive, how skilled we are at detailing our particular message... we can only get 7% of the total message across to our audience.

And we may indeed be quite adept at written communication... but in this environment... only 7% is effectively communicated.


In my writing, I cannot get across the excitement, pleasure, happiness, joy, sorrow, irritation, anger, etc through my facial expression, body language, my speech elements.

Even the best vocabulary is limited.. it definitely helps, but it's still limited.

I've been on the internet since 1997, and talking about Jesus since at least 1999. I attended college and worked with PhD scientists, engineers, professionals in various industries since.
Most of the time, written communication was all we had.
 
SteveB said:
I think in a written medium, the most difficult thing is to get across an important point without offending.

20 years ago I was working in an office (my first. I'd been in a field construction environment dating back to 1985), and I was being told that I wasn't fitting in, and needed better communication skills.
So I was able to take a professional course on communication.

Turns out that there's a rather interesting collection of articles on this topic, and while the breakdown is done in a manner that varies, the version I learned breaks communication down in this way.



Written word- 7% of the total message.
Speech- tonality, inflection, pitch, etc... 38% of the total message.
Body language - 55% of the total message.

On internet forums, we are restricted to the written word.

This means that no matter how eloquently we are, how descriptive, how skilled we are at detailing our particular message... we can only get 7% of the total message across to our audience.

And we may indeed be quite adept at written communication... but in this environment... only 7% is effectively communicated.


In my writing, I cannot get across the excitement, pleasure, happiness, joy, sorrow, irritation, anger, etc through my facial expression, body language, my speech elements.

Even the best vocabulary is limited.. it definitely helps, but it's still limited.

I've been on the internet since 1997, and talking about Jesus since at least 1999. I attended college and worked with PhD scientists, engineers, professionals in various industries since.
Most of the time, written communication was all we had.
Click to expand...
Interesting stats. One thing with the NT Greek is that there is inflection in the writing unlike our English. Just something to consider :)

But your point is well taken. And it’s so very true. I have to “ read “ a room many times with families and I can see it in their body language and facial expressions. And like you say they might say something politely but their body language and expressions say otherwise.

I also observe this in our home groups , men’s discipleship groups that meet. I can see if there needs more clarity, probing, questioning or clarifying needed that you can’t get here on a forum. Great topic for discussion.
 
Handaan said:
Well the Bible does say that laughter is good medicine. I wonder if humor and laughter are an attribute of God. He gave us our sense of humor and we're created in his image.
Click to expand...
Sure it all comes out of the spirit of joy although you don't need laughter to have joy but it can be a part of it. God's sense of humor can be seen in creation. Really though there's some created things it can only be said they were created that way to put a smile on people's faces. Look at a zebra. You have all sorts of horses, work horses, riding type horses. this type or that....but

then you have one that looks like stripes have been painted on it.(Zebra) Or think of a raccoon. You look at this creature and you'd swear it's can't be coincidental it appears it's wearing a black mask on it's face. It looks like a bandit. Then you look at a dolphin. The appearance on it's face and the noise it makes looks like it's laughing. (more could be said)
 

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